When...

Sometimes you think you are of what importance because you feel somehow, somewhere what you have done will make worth of that importance. However, when you are slapped with the reality that shows what you have been denying all this time is true, you tend to wonder what should you do now? Shrugs to me now. SIGH!                         

And So...

I was such a wet blanket 2 days ago. I feel I can eat up a person even though he or she wasn't doing anything wrong. I know, it seems like I got attitude problem. LoL! Anyways, I always have this moment when I found out something is wrong and I don't know how to solve it. And, I was bitter over it. Make it, VERY bitter.

Although now I'm no longer a wet blanket as I can make jokes, smile, laugh without eating anyone up, the issue still doesn't seem to have any solution. Well, sort of. I did kind of came up with a plan. But to know whether the plan would work to solve my issue, that's entirely a different story. And also, I'm not too confident in it as my plan might backfire, due to I'm a softy no matter what.

The plan is simple... what you do to others, will do to you too. Yeah, it sounds so bitterly revengeful right? But, actually... it's more like showing what is wrong rather than telling it is wrong. Some people just need to be put in other people's shoes to know how it feels. However, me being a softy, given time I might just forget all about it and back to square one. And that is what I'm afraid of. So... I need to pull this off successfully without making it worst. Sounds like a challenge which... I also not sure how am I going to do it successfully. Seriously, what's so hard to sometimes make yourself think of others? Gosh!

And You Thought You Know Best

Sometimes you thought you know the person so well after many years. But seriously, how well do you know the person? After all the years you know the person, of course you feel the person will be concern or care for you. That is what everyone will assume, isn't it? But how come there are loop holes that indicate otherwise? How come suddenly you feel the person has turn so selfish? Has turn into someone who has full-heartedly been receiving but not giving? What went wrong?

Is it wrong to think that if you are kind to others, somehow the kindness will rub onto the person? In reality, does it ever work? All the while I've been trying my best to be the good person that I am, even to the extend that the person tell me I was near perfect but somehow, I don't feel the perfectness. I feel I'm still on the losing end. How can that be?

Is it ever wrong to ask for someone to show a little bit of concern. Is it ever wrong? If it's not wrong why some people just won't show it? No matter how much you have been giving and yet, there's simply no receiving anything back. Then what's the point of giving so much? In the end, will just end up being so stupid facing the selfish reality. And that alone, truly hurts.

The Problem With Anger

Would you believe me if I say I have anger issues? Yes, most of the time I can be damn relax, happy-go-lucky feeling but when my anger strikes, is like all hell breaks loose. Probably some don't know that when I'm so pissed off I feel like throwing things (and it happened before). The anger just kept on building up until I feel I need to release it out and throwing things seems to suit my situation. I know it's bad that's why I've all along tried to control my temper whenever I felt the anger is coming. You can call this episode as "almost to detonation". And today, I felt it.

I was angry because a promise wasn't fulfilled which is not something new actually. I even told myself, don't expect it to happen. But, even though I told myself that, I still look forward to it. Stupid, I know. So, when it REALLY didn't happen, the anger just strike up. Of course I felt like yelling, demanding for explanation but I didn't do that as I was still in control. I got my explanation and apology but I felt the "sorry" that was given far too many times doesn't help ease the anger anymore. The first few times, yes, I was considerate but after too often, the word is just a meaningless word that won't make things better. Seriously, I don't want the apology. It will make things way, way better if... the promise was fulfilled eventually, no matter when.

I guess half of the anger was also towards myself. Felt angry because I was too stupid to ever believe it. When will I ever learn, seriously? So yeah, the anger didn't subside after few hours. I really felt like detonating. I seriously hate this feeling. I hate when my anger kept on building up as it will bring back all the negative emotions. I hate it so much but yet people will still make me pissed off. I'm not so easily pissed but why would people push me till that stage? I'm afraid one day my anger will overwhelm me. Hoping that the time won't come. If only people will uphold their promises.

Anyway, after going out to get some "fresh air", I felt much better but still... a tiny bit of anger is still there. But at least I don't feel like detonating! Too much of disappointment is seriously, NOT HEALTHY! Sigh... when will I ever get over my stupidity? *shrugs*

My Top 5 Treat List

I'm sure everyone has their list of things they want to get be it, a gorgeous dress they saw at a shop but can't afford it, a book they are so into it but the price is over their budget, holidaying at a sunny beach of California but the expenditure is overbearing. This kind of list just gives us an aim and motivation to achieve what we have always wanted. And so, here is my special Top 5 Treat List which I really should treat myself to. I rarely ever treat myself, only occasionally. Let's kickstart to the first on the list!

#1 Discovering Japan with good friends

Ohayo, Japan!

I have always LOVE to visit Japan. It is one of my top list countries that I want to go since... FOREVER. Experiencing a different culture, learning a few Japanese words, eating those oishii Japanese food and being in a totally vast technological country seem to be the ideal treat for a getaway! I couldn't ask for more than THIS! :D

#2 A karaoke session with friends

Let's sing along!

Alright, I may sound super alien here but I HAVE NEVER been to a karaoke session. Never once and I've been dying to go to one. So, treating myself to a first-time singing my lungs out, is such a good thing, isn't it? It will be great if my birthday is to be held in a karaoke room with friends going crazy in the room. Just somehow reminded me of a scene in the Korean drama, My Name is Kim Sam Soon where the couple and the girl's mother and sister went crazy karaoke-ing. I would love that! LOL!

#3 A tub of Baskin Robbins or Haagen Dazs

Yummy-licious!

After trying my best to keep on budgeting and budgeting, I rarely had any Baskin Robbins or Haagen Dazs. For me, that's luxury ice-cream. The one thing that I can indulge in is McDonald's RM1 ice-cream cone or IKEA's RM1 ice-cream cone. Sounds cheapskate but times are bad. *shrugs*. So for once, I really would love to indulge myself in a tub of Baskin Robbins or Haagen Dazs. And after finishing the whole tub, my face will be planted with that HUGE satisfying smile which just shows how YUMMY the ice-cream is. Aahhh... heaven!

#4 Stuffing myself with Korean BBQ and other Korean delicacies

Oh-so sumptuous. Drooling!

Korean BBQ is just THE BOMB! Thinking about it already made me salivating. Damn! Each time I watch any Korean drama, my urge to eat those Korean food will instantly appear. The kimbap, bibimbap, bbq beef/pork, kimchi ramen... OMG! I really, seriously need to treat myself to that! *slurps*

#5 Sipping Starbucks coffee while surfing the net

Just right for me!

I never have the privilege of enjoying a cup of iced latte in Starbucks while surfing the net there. Alright, I may be able to do that on my smart phone BUT with a laptop is so much better and easier! And I never own a laptop before to enjoy the benefits (SERIOUSLY). If I have a Dell Inspiron 13, my idea of treating myself to enjoy a cool iced latte on a sunny, hot Sunday afternoon while chatting with friends on MSN and blogging will be materialised! How cool is that? I can basically online anywhere. I can even enjoy my coffee/tea while doing my work at Starbucks, Old Town and etc., and when I'm sick of doing my work, just click onto YouTube! I can online when I go back to my hometown too! How convenient! All I need is the sleek-looking Dell Inspiron 13. *grins*

So, there goes my Top 5 Treat List! Sounds achievable? Well, I DO hope to achieve all that! *cross my fingers* Dell has a special coupon code for those who purchase the Dell Inspiron 13. Present the code and you'll get a RM100 Instant Cash Redemption. It is only available online or by calling them. The coupon will only valid until 10 November 2009, which is SOON! The code: 7ZQVQF2RLZRKW3, So, hurry hurry!

Green Eyes Monster

So yeah I'm having green eyes now. Big deal. But I can't help it when I hear my friends each and everyone has something going on during this weekend. One had gone up to Genting with friends to party, another is already at Poppy tonight and have plans during the weekend, another went back hometown because out-of-town friends are coming down and another has farewell party today & friend's birthday tomorrow at Velvet. And me, plan-less. So why not the green eyes?

I heard on radio that they are having a blood donation drive tomorrow at the Curve. Since I got nothing to do and I'm not on any medication, probably I can go donate some blood. I've been wanting to do it for so many times but each time I'm always on medication. It looks like an excuse but it's true!! I was on antibiotics at that time. So yeah, maybe I'll do some charity. Will see how!

But I'm still having that green eyes! :P

Updated: Note to self - google first before simply heading to anywhere. The blood donation drive is only happening next week, 15 November! Me, being so smart, went to the Curve today thinking I can go and donate blood. Turns out, it was such a waste of time and money (I had to pay my parking for nothing!). Sigh! Should have checked before going.

AAR Gives A Rocking Concert

As usual after every production, I'll take a break to rest back home. And this time, I spent 4 days at home doing nothing but eat, sleep and watch my TVB marathon. I managed to finish 2 TVB dramas! And on Saturday, I came back up to catch the All American Rejects (AAR) concert organised by DiGi Music. The concert was initially to be scheduled on 10 October but because the lead singer, Tyson Ritter had a knee injury, it was postponed to yesterday.

Alright, I got to be upfront. I wasn't very keen to watch AAR as I wasn't their biggest fan. I do have a few of their songs from their first album but I'm definitely not a devoted fan. But since it's free as I'm a DiGi user and my friends are going, so why not. However, this I got to add. On the day the concert was to go on, I was re-thinking whether I should go or not. But because there's no reason to convince me not to, I went in the end!

We waited for quite awhile for it to start as you know, international stars can't be on time. Oh ya, before that, there were also our local acts performing but we skipped all that to get to the main event - AAR. When the band finally appeared, everyone went wild. I would say they have great showmanship. They interact with the crowd well. Actually, Tyson knows how to entertain the crowd. Thumbs up! Overall, it was a rocking concert although I felt it was quite a short one. And what we observed, there were lots of youngsters as in teenagers attending. We felt a tiny bit "old". Hahahaha.. Despite the drizzle, it was quite an awesome concert on a Halloween Day! Cheers to that! :D

The Day I Saw Lee Min Ho

When I heard that Lee Min Ho from the Korean F4 drama, Boys Over Flowers is coming to Malaysia, I was quite excited. He's currently one of my favourite Korean actors for obvious reasons - he's tall and cute, and his acting is quite OK. :P I was contemplating to go and see him since it's not every day I'll be able to see my favourite stars.

There was a point where I was in a dilemma as a friend asked me out for movie on the same day that Min Ho will be down in Malaysia (Sungei Wang to be precise). I was in dilemma because I know there will definitely be lots of fans who want to catch Min Ho. And if I go and wouldn't be able to see him then it will be a waste of time which I could just go and watch the movie instead. So, what I did was... I flipped a coin to decide. LOL! The results was... to see Lee Min Ho!

And so, I took the LRT all the way to Sungei Wang. I decided not to drive because, I'm not very sure how to go to Sungei Wang and besides, taking the LRT is way cheaper and much more convenient. I can't imagine finding parking on a weekend. It's been 1 year plus since I took the LRT and nothing has changed from what I observed. Hahaha...

When I reached Sungei Wang, the concourse area where Min Ho will make his appearance was already swarm with his fans. I was trying to squeeze through to find a perfect spot for me to stand to see him and take photos. I have to tell you, in this kind of scenario, if you have the height, is seriously an advantage! Luckily, I have a little of that. So, even from quite a distance I could see the stage clearly, so means... I can see Min Ho clearly. ;)

As always with stars, they can't make their appearance on time. So, the fans and I waited about 40-45minutes for it to start. Ok, the reason he was down in Malaysia was because he's a spokesperson for a Korean comestic/skincare brand called Etude House and they have just launch a new product (or 2, didn't pay much attention to that). And so, Min Ho was down to launch the product(s). But I think it's more like showing his oh-so-cute face so that fans will buy the products. It's a marketing gimmick. Oh ya... apparently if you want to get his autograph, you can purchase their products, rm20 and above to get a free poster which he will only sign on. Marketing tactic, wouldn't you say? I was tempted to buy and get the poster, I admit. But I was thinking what am I going to buy when I already have what I want (although from another brand) and even if I have the poster, there's no guarantee that I'll be able to get his signature. Oh ya.. I was also kind of lazy to drop by the store to see what I can buy. So, in the end I told myself, save it. Just go and see his oh-so-cute face, that's enough!

How the poster would look like

After waited while I played my sudoku, he finally made his appearance. I tell you, at this moment, fans went crazy (not me, mind you)!! They literary screamed and pushed just so they can get nearer to the stage. And boy, he is seriously TALL AND CUTE!! Those smile can just swoon you over. Unfortunately for me, people kept on pushing me here and there, it was really difficult to take a perfect shot. Thus, my shots weren't that good, some even blurry and all photos are taken from my N97. But somehow, because of the push, I kept on getting closer and closer to the stage that I can see him even much clearer! Whooopeee! He really looked like in the drama. So means... he's no fake! He is genuinely good looking!! :D

Lee Min Ho during the product launching

Although I was young at heart in wanting to come to see him, I seriously not THAT young to continue ga-ga over there for such a long time. The fans screamed their lungs out while I just kept my mouth shut and they seriously pushed real hard just so they can be closer to him while I really not that crazy to do that BUT somehow, got no choice but to follow the flow. At that moment, it's like being in a sauna. I sweat like nobody business and trying my very best to get some nice shots. When it was time for his autograph signing, I was quite close to the stage that I can see him much upfront. But because of the sweat and heat, I couldn't stand anymore, I told myself one last time to see him and I'm getting out of there. Oh ya, forgot to mention, before he made his appearance I saw a girl almost fainted. She looked so pale. Poor thing.

Lee Min Ho during the autograph signing session

Anyway, after I managed my way out from the swarm of fans, I initially wanted to leave the place. However, right at that moment he was about to leave already. Luckily I didn't get the poster. The autograph signing session was kind of short. He said his goodbye and I was able to see him for the very last time. After that, as he leaves, fans went chasing towards his direction but not me, I went the opposite. LOL! But I got to say this, he didn't really make my heart flutter unlike Jien. Though I do like to see Min Ho, my idolising for Jien is much more (probably because it has gone on for 10 over years!). LOL! So, that's my experience seeing Lee Min Ho. How I wish I will be able to see my top favourite Korean actor, Lee Dong Gun too! Time will tell, perhaps. :P

Lee Min Ho saying his goodbye