It certainly has been a long, long while since I blogged. What happen?
Well, many things have happened. The most major one will be... I quit being a writer. Although I have the passion in me, I just don't have the flair in it. I just can't be the best at what I'm passionate in. Funnily enough, isn't it?
Now I'm entering into something that's so new and foreign - marketing. When I first took on this job, I didn't know how much workload it will be thrown at me. But after working for about 8 days, I see the accumulation of workload. And today, it affected my emotion. My previous boss said was true. I am an emotional person in work. Especially when I'm so stress and being heavily burden by such a major workload, I just became so solemn and moody.
I actually felt suffocated. At this early stage. I thought I will be given the time to really learn and know how the marketing job works. Get to know what is what, where is where. But instead, I was given brief explanation here and there, and was straight on given to execute everything on my own. And seriously, I know shits! There are so many things that I don't know and just learning to know. It felt like I was just learning to walk, but now I'm expected to be able to run fast and jump high. Seriously, I am so incapable of doing that!
With this, I feel I'm disappointing my manager. I know I'm supposed to help lessen the burden. But looking at my situation now, I feel like I'm adding on more problems as I still don't know so many things and keep on asking and asking and asking. And I know how irritating it can be when you are so caught up with work and people keep on asking you left and right. Seriously, I too want to be independent and working on my own, and at the end of the day I will deliver the tasks that I was given to do. But, you can't expect me to be such a superwoman after only 8 days! I am learning but you got to give me more time! Seriously, I still need to be guided. And not just throw the work to me and expect me to be so genius to know everything. I'm sorry, but I'm just not that smart!
I'm not saying I can't work or I'm giving up. I'm just asking to give me more time to learn and catch up. I know I can handle the workload, but what I'm asking for is... time. Really. Give me time to know what is what and where is where and I'll be able to execute what is needed, on time. Please?